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- Me, remembering my trauma: that sure was a doozie
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can’t relate
To what
i just can’t relate
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Me as a doctor: So I’m gonna need you to just keep that baby in for another 5 minutes. It’s the difference between a Scorpio moon and a Sagittarius moon, thank me later lol
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it never occurred to me that some people actually “gradually stir in” their pasta
Yeah?? What do you do with yours???
dump it all in the pot at once like the spaghetti goblin I am
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me when my fave song comes on after ive pressed shuffle 53 times
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There’s like a 65% chance that Walt Disney has busted a nut at Disneyland.
He had his own personal apartment there so what you think the man gonna do when he got a moment?
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alignment chart: 11th grade english edition
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“As for myself, I had a lot to say. But I was silent.”
— Albert Camus, from Youthful Writings; “Intuitions,” wr. c. 1932
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High schoolers be like: ughhhh school is coming up
College Students be like: 25 days and 16 minutes until we move in
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brain: u gotta be… The Best™
me: ok so we’ll work hard then?
brain: no work… only Best.
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"I don’t know how to stay tender
with this much blood in my mouth"– Ophelia, Act IV, Scene V (via incorrectshakespeare)
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california? you mean the place in the red hot chili peppers songs? you know that’s not real right?
